Thursday
May032007
(Bad) Parent Conferences & ADHD
Thursday, May 3, 2007 at 10:10AM
I was trying to remember what I said MOFA stood for...oh yes, today's Mission of Outrageous Fun & Adventure...
Well, today's MOFA was the obligatory, at-least-quarterly, (Bad) Parent Conferences(s)(two this morning!) at school, to talk about our youngest child, Tiger, age 6, 1st grade. Big Sigh
I have to say first that Tiger is an AMAZING kid. We are very fortunate to have three great kids: happy (for the most part, most of the time), healthy, extremely bright, and ACTIVE. They all keep me and my husband on our toes, and laughing a lot, too. But they each have their challenges, as we all do.
This year, we have embarked, unwillingly and unknowingly, on the ADHD adventure, with Tiger. That's Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, with a very big H, in Tiger's case. And I hate the word Disorder, because it's not a handicap or something bad, in our opinion and experience. As I said, he is an AMAZING kid, he's scary smart and he's got a heck of a lot of energy. He is our young Tony Hawk, in terms of always on the move, pushing himself, serious risk-taker, no fear. All of that doesn't play so well at school, where he excels academically, but he's a mess as far as impulsive behavior and self-control. And yet, he is a good kid, not angry, not violent or destructive. He is outgoing, charming, funny, and fun to be around.
Over the last year, we have learned a lot about ADHD, and we have tried so many different things: medication (disastrous), nutrition (good), therapy (in progress) and various behavioral modification plans (mixed). It's not a quick-fix kind of thing. We are still trying to find the best strategies to help him develop some control over his very busy self and enjoy success at school, all the while he is growing so quickly and changing day-to-day.
So that's today's MOFA, and it always seems like a bit of a beat-down, these conferences and meetings, even though the school people are very nice.
In all my reading and research about ADHD over the last year, one of the best sources of information and support I have found is a Yahoo!Group called ADHDParentSupportGroup. If you are dealing with any of these kinds of issues, you might want to check it out and I'll write about some other resources soon.
Well, today's MOFA was the obligatory, at-least-quarterly, (Bad) Parent Conferences(s)(two this morning!) at school, to talk about our youngest child, Tiger, age 6, 1st grade. Big Sigh
I have to say first that Tiger is an AMAZING kid. We are very fortunate to have three great kids: happy (for the most part, most of the time), healthy, extremely bright, and ACTIVE. They all keep me and my husband on our toes, and laughing a lot, too. But they each have their challenges, as we all do.
This year, we have embarked, unwillingly and unknowingly, on the ADHD adventure, with Tiger. That's Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, with a very big H, in Tiger's case. And I hate the word Disorder, because it's not a handicap or something bad, in our opinion and experience. As I said, he is an AMAZING kid, he's scary smart and he's got a heck of a lot of energy. He is our young Tony Hawk, in terms of always on the move, pushing himself, serious risk-taker, no fear. All of that doesn't play so well at school, where he excels academically, but he's a mess as far as impulsive behavior and self-control. And yet, he is a good kid, not angry, not violent or destructive. He is outgoing, charming, funny, and fun to be around.
Over the last year, we have learned a lot about ADHD, and we have tried so many different things: medication (disastrous), nutrition (good), therapy (in progress) and various behavioral modification plans (mixed). It's not a quick-fix kind of thing. We are still trying to find the best strategies to help him develop some control over his very busy self and enjoy success at school, all the while he is growing so quickly and changing day-to-day.
So that's today's MOFA, and it always seems like a bit of a beat-down, these conferences and meetings, even though the school people are very nice.
In all my reading and research about ADHD over the last year, one of the best sources of information and support I have found is a Yahoo!Group called ADHDParentSupportGroup. If you are dealing with any of these kinds of issues, you might want to check it out and I'll write about some other resources soon.
Reader Comments (2)
I am not anywhere near knwoing IF I'll be dealing with ADHD but I can say that my little boy has been interesting to deal with at Kindermusik. i was unprepared for feeling like my child might be the one that gets me kicked out of playgroups. He's such a happy, good natured little guy - until the group setting happens! One week he's hitting the next he's hugging people who do not want to be hugged. Did you ever see the episode of Seinfeld about the 'close talker' -that's my two-year-old. He gets in kids faces and just invades their space. So every Monday feels like it could be a bit of a 'beat down' - I know its good for both of us but its wound up being so much more than music class!
I talk to several friends who have only children with ADD/ADHD, and they went for years feeling guilty, thinking it was the result of bad parenting (some still do feel that guilt), before they learned ADHD behaviors are NOT the result of parenting or environment, good or bad. It's in the chemical make-up of the child.
We're still coming to an understanding of ADHD, since there is so much information and so many conflicting beliefs. I do know, however, that these active, high-energy kids are special and have the potential to accomplish amazing things if they are not beat down and lose all self-confidence in the school years. We absolutely celebrate Tiger's 'race-car brain' -- exactly what it takes to change the world. We just have to figure out how to get them through our decidedly un-ADHD educational system.